Inside the candlelit halls of the The Young Pope, Pope Pius XIII — Lenny Belardo himself — shocked the cardinals with an unusual declaration.
“Rome,” he said calmly, “has survived emperors, barbarians, and television. It can survive democracy in Los Angeles.”
The Vatican press office erupted into confusion after Lenny announced a symbolic international vote for the next mayor of Los Angeles. Journalists screamed questions. Cardinals looked physically ill. One elderly bishop whispered that the Antichrist had finally arrived in California wearing sunglasses.
But Lenny remained perfectly still.
“The people of Los Angeles worship fame,” he said. “Very well. Let us at least encourage them to elect someone entertaining.”
Among the invited celebrity observers was Spencer Pratt, who arrived carrying a velvet pouch of crystals polished like sacred relics. He spoke passionately about positive energy, cosmic alignment, and the emotional intelligence of hummingbirds.
To everyone’s astonishment, Lenny listened carefully.
Later, in the Vatican gardens, the pope watched Spencer gently feeding hummingbirds from a glass feeder hanging near the lemon trees. Tiny wings buzzed like miniature helicopters in the Roman sunset.
Lenny folded his white robes and nodded with genuine admiration.
“You know,” the pope said quietly, “most men chase power. You chase beauty. Crystals, birds, silence. It is strangely Franciscan.”
Spencer smiled. “The hummingbirds trust calm energy.”
Lenny looked toward the sky.
“In Los Angeles,” he murmured, “that may qualify you for public office.”
For one brief moment, the Vatican staff saw something almost impossible:
Pope Pius XIII laughing.
