Tag Archives: Rothschild

I Put All My Money Into the XCOM Project

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INT. UNDERGROUND BUNKER – NIGHT

The alien sirens echo faintly through steel walls. Flickering monitors cast cold blue light on G.I. JOE and his two brothers, standing ready.

JACOB ROTHSCHILD enters, his cane tapping on the concrete floor. His voice carries the weight of scripture.

JACOB ROTHSCHILD
(quoting)
“They kill the widow and alien; the fatherless they murder.”
(Psalm 94:6)

He lowers the Bible and stares at Joe.

JACOB ROTHSCHILD
That verse… it’s about them. The invaders. They don’t just slaughter soldiers — they erase the weak, the forgotten, the innocent.

Joe’s jaw tightens.

G.I. JOE
So that’s why you put everything into XCOM?

JACOB ROTHSCHILD
In 1994, when the nations turned their backs, I mortgaged my legacy. I risked every Rothschild coin to keep the Project alive. Do you understand, Joe? The world abandoned the fight, but I could not.

He steps closer, his eyes fixed on Joe and his brothers.

JACOB ROTHSCHILD
I chose you three because you did what no one else could. You beat the game in record time. What was a simulation for others… was prophecy for you.

Joe looks down at the battered XCOM insignia Jacob presses into his palm.

JACOB ROTHSCHILD
This isn’t just war, Joe. This is scripture unfolding. And if we fail… Psalm 94 will be written in our blood.

The alien sirens rise to a scream.

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The Secrets of Le Baron

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Scene: A cracked highway outside of town. A battered green Chrysler Le Baron convertible sputters along. Deadpool is behind the wheel, scarf flapping in the wind, humming the Freddy Got Fingered theme off-key. G.I. Joe sits shotgun, visibly regretting every choice that led him here.

Deadpool:
Ahhh, smell that, Joe? That’s freedom. That’s style. That’s… burning transmission fluid. But mostly—freedom.

G.I. Joe (grimacing):
Why is it green?

Deadpool (cheerfully):
Because, my sweet naïve action figure, this is no ordinary Le Baron. This is the Tom Green Special. Straight outta Freddy Got Fingered. Behold—the Freddymobile!

G.I. Joe:
You’re telling me we’re rolling into a mission in a car named after a comedian who pretended to play a piano with sausages?

Deadpool (snaps fingers):
Exactly! This isn’t just a car. It’s an icon of cinematic brilliance. Well, “brilliance” is a strong word. Let’s say… an icon of cinematic… existence.

G.I. Joe (folds arms):
Looks like a Rothschild psyop to me. “Le Baron.” Can’t fool me.

Deadpool (gasps):
You mean Tom Green was secretly working for the Rothschilds? My God. It all makes sense. The sausages… the backwards man… all subliminal banker propaganda!

G.I. Joe:
I’m serious. They hide symbols in plain sight. You think Chrysler picked “Le Baron” at random?

Deadpool (revving the dying engine):
Yep, nothing screams “ancient banking cabal” like a $500 convertible that smells like raccoon pee. Truly the ride of the elites.

(The Le Baron sputters, backfires, and then the roof half-collapses while they’re driving.)

Deadpool (cheering):
See that? That’s not a breakdown—that’s the Rothschilds pulling strings. They’re mad at you, Joe. They know you know.

G.I. Joe (gritting teeth):
I’m starting to think you’re the psyop.

Deadpool (grinning under mask):
Shhh. Don’t ruin the sequel—G.I. Joe vs. Freddy Got Fingered 2: Baron Harder.

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The Bogdanov Twins & Jacob Rothschild

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Phone Call: The Bogdanov Twins & Jacob Rothschild

Scene: A dimly lit study in an undisclosed European château. The air crackles with an otherworldly energy as the Bogdanov twins, Igor and Grichka, initiate a secure quantum-encrypted call. Across the line, in a London estate, Jacob Rothschild answers, his voice calm but wary.

Jacob Rothschild: [measured] Who is this?

Igor Bogdanov: Jacob, you know who we are. You have always known.

Grichka Bogdanov: We have watched you, as you have watched us. The cycle of debt must end.

Jacob Rothschild: [chuckles lightly] Ah, the Bogdanovs. Still playing with the fabric of time, I see. And what is it you wish to discuss?

Igor Bogdanov: The chains you have placed upon Europe. The invisible prison of debt.

Grichka Bogdanov: You will release them.

Jacob Rothschild: [pauses] And if I refuse?

Igor Bogdanov: Then you will face the consequences beyond your comprehension.

Grichka Bogdanov: We have seen what happens when empires hold too tightly to their ledgers. Rome. Byzantium. The House of Medici. And now, the House of Rothschild.

Jacob Rothschild: [coldly] You overestimate your reach. The system is beyond even me now. It moves on its own.

Igor Bogdanov: No, Jacob. The system is a machine, and you still hold the lever. Release your grip, or the machine will devour its master.

Grichka Bogdanov: The energy debt must be cleared. The quantum balance restored. You understand this, don’t you?

Jacob Rothschild: [sighs] And what do you propose? A jubilee? A reset?

Igor Bogdanov: We propose survival. For you, for your house, for the world. But only if you act now.

Grichka Bogdanov: The choice is yours, Jacob. But not for long.

A long silence. The weight of centuries hangs between them.

Jacob Rothschild: [softly] I will consider it.

Igor Bogdanov: No. You will do it.

Grichka Bogdanov: Time is not on your side, old friend.

The line goes dead. In London, Jacob Rothschild stares at the receiver, the flickering candlelight casting shadows on his face. The twins have spoken. The future trembles.

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