Tom Cruise’s Sham Marriage

Tom Cruise Sham Marriage


“The Simpsons” A Fish Called Selma (TV episode 1996)

Meanwhile, Marge and Patty try to tell Selma that Troy is just using
her, but she doesn’t want to admit it. She runs away to find Troy and
find answer to her questions.

Selma: [menacing] Is this a sham marriage?
Troy: Sure baby, is that a problemo?
— Fair enough, “A Fish Called Selma”

Selma: You _married_ me just to help you carreer?
Troy: You make it sound so sordid, look: don’t we have a good time
together?
Selma: Yes, but…
Troy: Don’t you have everything you ever wanted here? Money, security,
a big hot flat rock for Jub Jub?
— Just what everyone would want, “A Fish Called Selma”

Selma: But… don’t you love me?
Troy: Sure I do! Like I love Fresca. Isn’t that enough? The only
difference between our marriage and any one else’s is: we know
ours is a sham.
— When you look at it this way…, “A Fish Called Selma”

Selma: Are you heterosexually challenged?
Troy: heterosexually challenged? I wish! If I were heterosexually challenged they’d be no problem! No, what I have
is a romantic abnormality, one so unbelievable that it must be
hidden from the public at all cost. You see…
Selma: Stop!
— Aw, we were just about to hear it all, “A Fish Called Selma”

Taken from the Simpsons.

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2 thoughts on “Tom Cruise’s Sham Marriage

  1. Tom, unfortunately for him, but fortunately for we the chosen put a catfish up his anus while he was performing reach around. The whiskers of a catfish have barbs like a porcupine. He needed complete anal reconstruction which costs millions. Lucky my cousin Rueben has seen this before and is an expert proctologist.

  2. Motherfukkka u have a mothafukkkin’s sham marriage nigga. The last time your shmeckel touched Esther’s pussy was during the Reagan administration.

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